Kind of. Weddings are generally unsustainable; they’re built that way due to societal pressure, legal formalities and costs. And we all want to have a nice wedding, why wouldn’t we? Since South Asian weddings tend to be huge family affairs, there’s cultural pressure and design elements that are key when upholding tradition. So can we make South Asian weddings more sustainable?

Of course we can – I did for mine! I wasn’t able to do everything that I wanted due to time, cost and culture, but there were lots of things I made sure of so waste was reduced. Like all things in life, perfection is an impossible measure of success; and if we constantly strive for perfection, we become demotivated. So don’t pressure yourself that every element must be sustainable – it can’t be!

A traditional South Asian wedding with sustainable elements isn’t impossible, we just have to get a bit more creative. Here are some of the things I did when I was getting married that are easy to incorporate into your plans.

Biodegradable confetti

It seems so obvious. This is something we should always be doing – when did it ever change from petals to plastic? And real flower petals don’t cost as much as you might think either. There are a few companies that sell real, freeze dried petals but these can cost a lot, and aren’t actually as eco friendly as they sound. Instead of buying them, collect petals from bouquets you or your friends and family receive. If you have a garden with flowers, then you’ve got lots of confetti options! You can also save the leaves from any trees or plants.

• Make sure the flowers or plants are beginning to wilt before you pull any petals or leaves off. If you’re collecting from a garden, grab the ones from the ground first.
• Separate all the petals and leaves from one another so they don’t stick and grow mould.
• Store them in a large tray or plate somewhere that’s dry and cool so they can continue to dry.
• You can tear them into smaller pieces if you want, or use a hole punch to get circles.

Rewearable or used clothes

Wedding dresses are also a sensitive subject, every person deserves to feel special and beautiful – especially if they have a vision for their day. South Asian weddings consist of several events, so wearing new clothes for each of them didn’t sit right with me. They also tend to be very heavy, with a lot of embroidery and it’s unlikely they’re worn again.

Even for my civil ceremony, where I wore a white gown, I wanted something eco friendly. When are any of us, ever, going to wear a white dress again? I looked online and in secondhand shops to see if there was anything I could get by thrifting. There are some amazing gowns from designers that are less expensive and just as beautiful, simply because they’re used. A seamstress can help with any alterations too!

To make my Asian more sustainable, I opted to wear my mum’s old outfit for one of my events. The other three were new. Not ideal, but there wasn’t a lot I could do. I went to my family and cousins, asking if I could borrow or wear their outfits if they had any in blood red or gold. Most of them let me take a look, but there was always an issue with the size, material or transportation from Pakistan back to the UK. I wanted to cut up a few and create something new, but that didn’t go down well! And my mum’s wedding outfit was really light gold, which I didn’t want to use, though I did end up wear her dupatta for my nikkah.

The outfits I did get can be reworn, (at least two of them can without me sticking out like a wannabe bride). And I’ve been able to mix and match the skirts with other clothes to have them look less bridal. So think about your outfit carefully.

• Can you rewear it with different clothes or jeans?
• Can you borrow someone else’s clothes for a few of the events?
• Have you looked online on reseller sites?
• Would it be possible to create something from clothes you already have?

E-vites or biodegradable invites

Do you keep old invitations? Some of us do; a lot of us don’t. I don’t think I have any, perhaps old cards, but not invites. Digital is the future, so why not make your invitations digital too? It prevents a lot of waste and saves cost. Most invitations have plastic and toxic paints that can’t be recycled. The glue that holds invitation boxes together also prevents them from being recycled. And what’s worse, if the invitation boxes or cards are personalised, guests can’t reuse them.

You could easily create something using Canva and send this to your guests. Another option could be a temporary website with all the information for the different events – share the right links with the right guests so they don’t see something they’re not invited to! This will save you on postage too.

Biodegradable invites are another solid option – one that I went for! These cards are much more simple in design but they’re waste-free. I was lucky enough to work with an artist to design and create my own cards on sustainable paper that breaks down in the ground. I also sourced compostable wax to use for the wax seals, and natural twine that also breaks down. It was expensive, but what isn’t during a wedding?

Old or secondhand shoes

I’m not a big shoe person. At all. But for my wedding I wanted to wear beautiful, sparkly shoes. It makes you feel special and more like a bride. But I wasn’t keen on spending lots of money or buying from somewhere designer (even though Louboutin’s are stunning). Taking a look online was a game changer, there are so many beautiful shoes, in really good condition that can work for wedding dresses. Ebay, Shpock and Vestaire Collective have so many items that are luxury, or high street, that are much less expensive and wasteful.

All of my dresses were floor length, so my shoes weren’t likely to be seen. I found a few online that could work, but in the end I didn’t get them. My sister had some beautiful shoes from her wedding, which she’d only worn the one time. The matched perfectly! Then I had some khussai (traditional Pakistani flat shoes) from years ago that I wore to the other events. They looked amazing with the dresses. And I still felt special. So think hard about the shoes; are they super important to you? Can you find secondhand pairs? Or is there someone you could borrow from?

Avoid glitter and plastic

Seems obvious enough, but so many things in weddings are glittery and plastic! Glitter is essentially just plastic, it cannot be recycled and breaks down into microplastics, the same way larger plastic does. These microplastics get into water systems and wildlife which can cause serious harm to the planet and health problems for us. Even though glitter looks nice, is it really worth dead animals?

Opt for items that don’t use plastic film and glue either, especially when it comes to favours (or bidh). You can find favour bags that are made from recycled materials, or use non-personalised boxes that guests can reuse. If you want to place chocolates or something on chairs, opt for foil wrapped, rather than plastic wrapped (foil can be recycled). Or just keep the chocolates in their own washable plate – no wrappers needed! You can also find biodegradable crockery to use.

Go vegan and vegetarian

Controversial. Especially at South Asian weddings where it’s all about the food and meat. I’m personally not a big meat eater, but I can’t deny my friends and family, and my husband’s family the food they like.

But are there elements you could have that are vegan or vegetarian? Like all the starters, or perhaps the desserts? I really wanted to have vegan only desserts and starters, but for South Asian cuisine it was really hard to find the right caterer, with the right budget that could pull it off. I mean ghee and yoghurt are in everything! So this didn’t work. But I managed to find different suppliers for biscuits and cheesecake for one of my events that were vegan. They were small business owners, local to my area so the added benefit is community support!

Ask the suppliers lots of questions

Who you work with will have an impact on your entire event. Finding the right people, who believe in the same things as you will help bring your vision to life. People are people, yes, and we need to be thoughtful about how we approach them and ask questions. But they’re also being paid for a service – we have every right to ask where items will come from, how it might be transported, will they need to travel far, etc.

Most decor companies, for example, reuse their staging, sofas and decor – but mirror walkways and light carpets are thrown away. Does the decor company have an alternative you can use? Are they able to work with a centre or scheme to ensure ‘single use’ items are cleaned, donated or recycled? What about flowers – they’re really unsustainable. Cut and placed for one day from a farm and often shipped from around the world. Ask if there are silk flowers that can be used and reused.

Does the caterer have a food scheme you can opt into? Can any waste or excess is donated or kept by the bridal/groom party with no liability to the supplier? Where does the food come from mainly? Is the meat local or from abroad? Can they use glass and ceramic, rather than plastic for canapes and starters?

Avoid international suppliers – there are plenty of talented people in your area that deserve a chance. The further away they are from you, the higher the carbon footprint.

Try your best but make yourself happy

It isn’t impossible to create a more environmentally friendly wedding. It might be more time consuming and research based, but it’s definitely possible. And as I mentioned before, it’s not about perfection. We can’t make every single element of our lives sustainable – the world, and we, aren’t built that way.

The most important thing you can do is ask thoughtful questions when you make a purchase, or choose a supplier. Do what will make you happy for the wedding events, even if it means choosing something that’s wasteful; life isn’t about living with guilt and regrets. We can save the planet by having an ecofriendly wedding, even if it’s just one or two small things that we do.

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